I am losing my mind.
Does anyone else ever wake up in a complete panic for no reason? This morning I was *snap* awake just like that at 6:30 (15 minutes before my alarm is due to go off) and just completely afraid, not in the ‘afraid of life’ way but in the ‘afraid there is a killer in my closet that is going to jump out and stab me at any moment’ way.
This is a completely insane and irrational fear… I’m well aware of this - I live in a really nice neighborhood with no crime that I’ve ever been aware of, I live on the 3rd floor of a house with 3 locked doors (count them.. THREE) between me and the outside world so the chances of a killer in my closet (or behind the curtain to my fire escape where I am more inclined to believe a killer would hide) are pretty slim. I tell myself these things but it doesn’t help. I’m a 23 year old who is pretty much just afraid of the dark. I think I’m insane. At night I don’t like there to be dark spaces behind me… I will occasionally jump into my bed because for some reason I’m freakishly scared of something. The thing that really confuses me though is that this is not an all the time thing. Sometimes I will not be scared at all and can walk around fine at night without having a freak out and the weirdest part of all to me is that this happens most in places I’m familiar with (ie. my apartment, my parent’s house). I am insane.

I will always find it necessary to have my bed in an area where nothing could possibly hide behind it.


Original Post: http://heathershae.tumblr.com/post/23187672
(that is more likely where I'll be posting random blog entries. for whatever reason I feel like when I'm updating livejournal I need to sit down and write a novel... and to be honest my life is just not that interesting. I do still read my friends page every day though.)

With that said here is a mini post:
For those of you that don't know (although most of you should by now) I graduated from RIT in August when I finished up my co-ops at RIT and Democrat & Chronicle. I took a job as a web designer at a company called Dawnbreaker in North Chili (a suburb of Rochester) I still live in the city and ummm other than that... I watch a lot of netflix movies? so come visit me. Also I'm turning into a lizard.... seriously - you should see my hands.